The Phoneticist

The Phoneticist

Civilizes even the most wild of creatures.

Why, with proper diction and grammar, even this insect could become a duchess!

The Phoneticist held the coveted title of Current Champ from Tuesday, September 23, 2008 to Tuesday, September 23, 2008, heartily vanquishing Feral Flea to earn it. Unfortunately, brutal defeat came soon after, at the merciless hands of Tongue Twisters.

This hero's magnaminous likeness was captured at the moment of glorious triumph by Kevin .

Audience

Quotes overheard while standing in the crowd that gathered to watch the carnage…

  1. By George, I think she's got it!

    L | [ a ]
  2. Mmmm. Flea and crumpets.

    Burt | [ a ]
  3. Wow, this cat does good work, not only can he civilizes his subjects, he can change the gender too.

    On a side not, his face looks a little familiar...

    netdruid | [ a ]
  4. Kevin, add a few more wrinkles and squint the eyes a little and you've nailed my Grandfather-in-law.

    Bravo work!

    netdruid | [ a ]
  5. For the sake of being a completist...

    The Fleas in France
    To the Tune of The Rain in Spain

    Commenters:
    Poor Ol' Crazy Cornell!
    Poor Ol' Crazy Cornell! Night and day
    He doodles away! Oh, poor Ol' Crazy Cornell!
    All day long In his chair; Hand clutched tight around his pen;
    Doesn't laugh; Doesn't smile;
    Never cracks a grin! Poor Ol' Crazy Cornell!
    Poor Ol' Crazy Cornell! On he draws Against all odds;
    Oh, poor Ol' Crazy Cornell! Nine p.m. Ten p.m.
    On through midnight ev'ry night.
    One a.m. Two a.m. Three...! More, Ol' Crazy Cornell!
    More, Professor Cornell! Hear us beg
    that we still want More, Ol' Crazy Cornell!
    Clap not Bert, Sea not Hole, Rolling rolling on the floor.
    Shred not Ream, Move not Spit, Don't say "It's over," cuz it's not...

    Feral:
    The fleas in France feast mostly in your pants!

    Kevin:
    By Sutter, he's got it! By Sutter, he's got it!
    Now once again, where do they feast?

    Feral:
    In your pants! In your pants!

    Kevin:
    And where do you wear those pants?

    Feral:
    In France! In France!

    Chorus:
    The fleas in France feast mostly in your pants!
    The fleas in France feast mostly in your pants!

    Kevin:
    In Pittsburg, Phillytown and Pottsville...?

    Feral:
    People pretty much are perfect.
    How kind of you to let me come!

    Kevin:
    Now once again, where do they feast?

    Feral:
    In your pants! In your pants!

    Kevin:
    And where do you wear those pants?

    Feral:
    In France! In France!

    Chorus:
    The fleas in France feast mostly in your pants!
    The fleas in France feast mostly in your pants!

    brendan | [ a ]
  6. Finally! My own misappropriated show-tune!

    Thanks for that, Brendan ;)

    bearskinrug | [ a ]

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Maître Dynamite

Maître Dynamite

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